We hear time and again that parents are the first catechists of their children…and rightly so.

I try to remember this when I am teaching, reminding myself that I am an ally of parents. Of course some parents are more invested in their children’s religious formation than others. My job is to do all that I can to provide parents with opportunities to embrace their role as the primary catechists of their children.

Having said all that, allow me to take a moment to salute my first catechist – my mom – as we celebrated her 80th birthday last night! Mom (and Dad, who is with the Communion of Saints), you did such a wonderful job of sharing the light of Christ with me…thanks so much! Happy birthday Mom! Love ya.

I came across an online adverstisement for “Life Coaches” that emphasized in big letters, “It’s about time you had someone focus entirely on YOU!”  The ad goes on to say that, “You will be the center of attention of your life coach because life coaching is all about YOU!”

Talk about narcissism!

We sometimes bring this approach to our spiritual lives. I’ve often reminded students and their parents, especially when preparing for the sacraments, that “this is not about what YOU’RE doing but about what GOD is doing in your life!”

We often think that First Communion, Confirmation, Marriage, and Holy Orders are all about the individual receiving the sacrament. How often do we say about a bride, “This is HER day” or first communicants, “This is THEIR day!” Scripture reminds us that “This is the day the LORD has made! Let us rejoice and be glad!” 

The first step to a healthy spirituality is to recognize that it’s all about what God is doing in my life and in the lives of others. My role – our role – is to respond to God’s action.

There’s no such thing as being proactive in spirituality. To be proactive is to initiate action. God has already taken the initiative. It’s up to us to respond.

Our model in all of this is Mary, the Mother of Jesus, who, even though she was chosen to bear the Son of God into the world, responded by magnifying, not herself, but God!

As catechists, we help those we teach to recognize God’s action in the lives of God’s people and to respond as Mary did, by giving praise to God and by bringing Christ to others.

We sometimes think of meditation as something reserved for mystics and monks. Meditation, however, is simply prayer that focuses attention on God so that we can recognize his presence in our daily lives and respond to what he is asking of us. Meditation, also called reflective prayer, involves the imagination. Kids have great imaginations and, as a result, they love to pray in this way. Here are some tips about leading reflective prayer (meditation) from my book, The Catechist’s Toolbox:

Reflective prayer (meditation) uses an approach inspired by St. Ignatius of Loyola. It invites us to pray by using the senses of imagination—sight, hearing, smell, taste, and touch. We thereby create a setting in our minds: a welcoming place—whether it is a biblical setting or a place of our own choice—to enter into conversation with Jesus. St. Ignatius said that such conversation should resemble the way “one friend speaks to another” (The Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius, 54).   

As we share reflective prayer or meditation, we lead participants to use reflection and imagination, to engage in prayerful conversation with God, and to recognize his presence in their daily lives. Here are some basic steps for leading reflective prayer.   

Getting Ready for Reflective Prayer—Invite the participants to focus on God’s presence. Establish a quiet, prayerful, and comfortable environment and mood to help them overcome the distractions. This first step may take anywhere from three to five minutes. Consider the following as you join them in reflective prayer:   

• Encourage a Comfortable Posture—If possible, move your participants to the prayer center and invite them to find a position in which they can be comfortable yet alert. If space is limited, invite them to get comfortable in their seats. Encourage your participants to close their eyes or to focus their attention on a symbol or a picture.   
  
• Invite Deep Breathing—Take two or three minutes to help the participants to relax and breathe deeply. Ask them to rest their hands and to slowly and silently breathe in deeply and then breathe out gradually. Help them establish a rhythm to their breathing by having them count slowly to three as they breathe in, and asking them to breathe out as you count to three.   
  
• Use Reflective Music—Reflective (instrumental) music can help by covering distractions and providing a soothing setting.     
  

Leading the Reflective Prayer—Begin the reflective prayer with an invitation to reflect or meditate on an aspect of the theme that you are teaching—often a Scripture passage or a traditional prayer. Reflection time with your participants can range from just a few minutes to a half hour depending on the age of your group and the circumstances.   

• Step-by-Step Directions—Through a series of age-appropriate “directions” that you have prepared or are following from a resource (such as a book of guided meditations for children, teens, or adults), you invite your participants to engage their imagination and enter into a setting where they can encounter Jesus, dwell on his words, and converse with him.     
  
• Speaking Slowly and Pausing—By speaking slowly and pausing for emphasis after each line of the reflection, you invite the participants to pray more reflectively.     
  Allowing Quiet Time with God—In closing, invite the participants to spend time in silence with God, while being aware of God’s presence. This is called contemplation. This last step may take anywhere from three to five minutes.   
  

Silent Prayer—Invite your participants to rest in God’s presence. Allow one or two minutes for silent prayer, depending on the responsiveness of the group.   

• Transition—A few gentle words provide a gradual transition of inviting the participants into the next activity.   
  
• Respect—Your participants’ thoughts and reflections in prayer are theirs alone. You show respect for their conversation with God by letting them keep these thoughts to themselves.
   

I mentioned yesterday the comment from a catechist (Fran) encouraging folks who are in their “golden years” to consider serving as catechists. Here is the latest from Fran:

Hi Joe,

I am going on 61 in October. I have no formal training to work with youth, but have always found a love for them and believe in their future. I feel, if I can help in any way, that is what we are here for. I am youth coordinator, at Our Lady of Grace, but find that all you need is a heart for kids. Kids are basically good and looking for direction.
God Bless!
Fran

I told Fran that parents have no formal training in parenting but, with love, figure out how to raise their kids properly. As catechists, we need not have a PhD in theology or psychology to succeed (although we certainly need formation and “basic” training in catechesis) but, with love, common sense, and help from our colleagues, we can help young people embrace the Catholic way of life.

Thanks, Fran.